Welcome to A Gravel Road Journey!

NOT SO LONG AGO, Dad RE-named his art studio, "A Gravel Road Studio", and so this seemed an appropiate title for his blog.

Why 'Gravel Road'? As Dad explains, "Gravel roads take us off life's busy highway and force us to slow down. When we slow down we have time - time to notice the things around us; the things that matter the most; life and breath, the flowers and the trees. Gravel roads allow us to taste the dust of our travel and give us time to breathe."

Since his studio is a place of quiet reflection and contemplation, we wanted to create a space for family and friends to do the same as we journey together down this new and unknown path. We also wish to keep family and friends updated on his diagnoses and treatment, so please check in often for updates and new information.

Monday, December 22, 2008

A Steady Decline

Hello everyone,

Just wanted to say a huge thank you to all of you for the continued support and prayers. Words can't begin to express how grateful we are for the outpouring of love that has been shown to our family over these last few months. And we're going to continue to need that support as Dad continues to decline. 

Starting today palliative home care workers will be at the house from 8:30 am till 4:30 pm seven days a week. The overnight care also continues 7 nights a week. It's an adjustment to have someone else in the house for so much of the day, but I know Mom really appreciates the extra set of hands when they need to get Dad up out of bed, or help him shift positions. He got a new hospital bed last week, one with a support bar on the top for him to help pull himself up when he needs to. Although, his strength is continuing to wane, and so he can only use it about 50% of the time. He also got permanent ports put into his left arm and thigh yesterday so that Mom doesn't have to try to get him to swallow pills anymore. She was shown yesterday how to administer liquid medication through the ports, and gets the pleasure of doing that a few times each day. In another life, she would have made a great nurse! 

Despite Dad's decline in health, though, we still have many things to be thankful for. The nurses have told us that patients with this sort of illness often become very irate and rude towards the end, lashing out at family or friends and even swearing at them. Thankfully, we have not seen that in Dad at all. While he sometimes gets annoyed at the constant regime of pills (which will be alleviated now with the ports), he is still very much the gentle, loving man that he has always been. We've even seen hints of his sense of humor still, which is such a blessing. We are also very thankful that he is still able to remain at home, where we are free to visit with him as often as we like and don't have to brave the cold weather every time we want to see him. He's also not in any sort of pain, which is a huge relief for all of us.

However, there is still the reality hanging over all of our heads that Dad is not getting any better. He is slowly declining and unfortunately, there is nothing we can do for him, short of keeping him comfortable. As Christmas draws near, we're all finding it a little difficult to be our usual cheerful selves. Christmas is normally such a happy time - a time for celebration. But our journey this year seems to be taking us down a different path - one of sorrow and of loss. It's so hard to find the joy of the season when we are slowly losing one we love so much. But, thankfully, there is One who loves us even more than we love Dad. Jesus Christ, who came as a baby at Christmas, to one day die on the cross to save us all - He gives us the hope and the strength that we need to keep going forward. Knowing that Dad walked so closely with Him brings a small measure of comfort and the peace of knowing that Dad will join Him in Heaven. 

And so we continue to ask for your prayers. Prayers for strength, and of peace and of God's love and comfort. We need to feel those things so desperately right now. Pray also that what will most likely be our last few weeks with Dad would be good weeks for our family - that we would continue to love and support each other in our hurt and our grief. And please continue to pray for Dad - that he would continue to be comfortable and without pain at home. And that he, too, would feel God's love during this time.  

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dana,

I sent the following note to all my Folkerts cousins and to Janis; This is for you and Jared too. I have never met you but the bond in the Holy Spirit that connects us in Christ is deep especially as I read your updates and sense how deep your love is for your father-in-law and our Lord.
God bless you and thank you for your loving support.

John Bolt
Grand Rapids, Michigan
Dear Cousin(s):
I am thinking about all of you right now along with Gerald and Arlis and especially your mother, my tante Annie. I really have very little to add to the volume of words that you will no doubt have heard and believed over the last days, weeks, and couple of months. I am torn between two parts of who I am---your cousin and the preacher. Right now the cousin part is hurting and needs the preacher really badly---all this seems just so unfair. I don’t understand it either. I turn to the laments of the Bible---Psalm 13, 73 etc.---I do know that I have a very limited perspective and that my not being able to make sense of it is not all that important. What is important is that I acknowledge that God is God, that he invites my lament (else why would it be in the Bible?), and above all that that he is my refuge and strength, that I am held in his loving arms. Christmas is a very difficult time to face all this; yet, it is the reality that God himself entered into the brokenness, pain and suffering of our sin-wrecked world and that he entered it in LOVE! Right now, that alone sustains us all---and it is more than enough.
One of the sad things about distance is that we have not seen much of each other face to face in recent years---please know that my love for you all and my prayers for your joy in the midst of all this grief remain.

John Bolt

Anonymous said...

Dear Folkerts Family,

I am glad that Gerald is still able to be at home, where you can sit with him and just be there for one another. There are no words to express the grief and sadness that you feel watching your dad slowly slip away.
I pray that Gerald would feel God near to him in these days and that soon he will be with the Lord.
I have been through the pain and sorrow of watching someone you love so dearly slip away.
My prayer is that your family would continue to love and support each other during this very difficult time.
You are surrounded by a community of believers that love all of you and pray for all of you.
May you continue to feel God's presence at this time.
I also pray for Gerald's mother that God would be also near to her.
Strength to you as you continue on this very difficult journey.

Blessings
Diane

Anonymous said...

Dear Gerald and Arlis and family,
We love you and continue to pray for you all - Annette & Dan

Anonymous said...

You and the family are in our prayers publicly each Sunday and personally for me. May God grant you comfort and strength and the hope that is needed each day until our Lord and Saviour returns in glory. May that day come quickly.

Peace.

Richard Bodini (Saskatoon)

Steve Bell said...

He all,

Several of Gerald's friends have been working to put together an exhibition of his work in Winnipeg. They've also put together a new website that features Gerald's paintings and gives the details for the upcoming exhibition in January.

Check out: www.folkerts.ca

t.sutton-smith art said...

I have just read the terrible news abd feel so sad. My name is Tom Smith and I served on the MSA with Gerald. I moved back to Scotland in August so have been out of touch with the arts scene in Winnipeg and knew nothing of this trajgedy.

I would just like to say that Gerald and all of his family are in my thoughts and prayers

Traci Vanderbush said...

Praying for your family......I am so sorry you're going through this. May the peace and presence of God flood your household.

Anonymous said...

i work at henderson libary and for many years now we have gotten to now the Folkerts family, we all want to send our prayers are with you all.
Mr.Folkerts is well knowen as they guy in the shorts no matter what season it is.
take care and our thoughts are with the whole family.

Canadian Dreams said...

YOu are in my thoughts and prayers every day. Take courage.
Brenda

scott hendric said...

We've been thinking of Gerald and your whole family a lot since September and we'll continue to pray for all of you. The painting that Gerald made for us as a wedding gift is displayed in our living room--bright side out.
Please send Gerald our love.

--Scott and Margaret Vande Kraats

Anonymous said...

Dear Folkerts family,

I missed my flight to spend Christmas with my family this morning because of all the snow out west here, my flight was canceled. So here I am Christmas day on hold with Air Canada for the last 2 hours waiting for another flight and thinking how important family is. I got Jared's invitation about Gerald's art show and started to read the blog that I hadn't read in a bit. So I am writing now with tears in my eyes as I think of you possibly spending your last Christmas together with Gerald. May today be a good memory in your hearts. May God bring you comfort and Joy as you celebrate his Son's birth today. My thoughts and prayers are very much with you. Love Kathleen Busch

Anonymous said...

Dear brother Gerald, Arlis and family:

If our hearts, feeling your pain, are a form of prayer...then prayers with your names written on them, drift heavenward,every minute, of every hour, of every day.

May the Peace of God be with you all

Ken and Judy

Anonymous said...

Dear Arlis, Cerald and Family... thinking of you each day as I read Dana's words. My heart breaks for all of you but I pray and believe that you will find strength and courage in God's love.

Lorraine